When the movie Spanglish hit the screens in 2004, it was dubbed "A comedy with a language all it's own." I don't think the producers even knew they were slipping a lesson for website owners who want better search engine listings into the movie.

In the movie, Adam Sandler's household needs a housekeeper. Enter Flora - a Spanish woman who is unable to speak a word of English. They have to figure out how to communicate.

As website owners know, this is much like trying to speak with search engine optimization people. As they rattle off terms like Organic Listings and SEM and SEO and SEP and SERP, the average webmaster begins to want a slurp more than a SERP.

So, let's trasnlate some of those terms, shall we?

• IBL is an In Bound Link, from another web site to yours.

• KWD is your Keyword Density, rated as a percentage.

• OBL is an Outbound Link. A link from your site to another.

• OOP is an Over-Optimization Penalty. You know... OOPs!

• PR is your PageRank. But only at Google, of course.

• Recip is a link trade where they actually link back.

• SEs are Search Engines

• SES (note the capital S) means Search Engine Strategies

• SEM is Search Engine Marketing

• SEO is Search Engine Optimization

• SEP is Search Engine Positioning

• SERPs are Search Engine Results Pages

• SEMPO is a Search Engine Marketing Professional Organization

  And, last, but not least.

• SPAM does not mean Stupid Pages Above Me, and

• Spamglish refers to keyword-rich gibberish that uninformed people use as search engine fodder instead of well written interesting content that real live human beings would actually want to read.

Don't use Spamglish. Bots don't have Visas. People are what's important. Just like Adam Sandler said. See?

P.S. My most sincere apologies to Adam Sandler and the cast and producers of "Spanglish" for this little parody. I couldn't resist.